I got married young. I was 22 years old and crazy in love. But my fairy tale didn't end as happily ever after as I had dreamed. After four very tough years of hard circumstances my husband decided to end the marriage. I was utterly devastated, left in complete shambles not knowing what way was up or down. Then the depression hit and I was grasping for help from anywhere.
God sent me angels, a group of women that had all been through the same thing as I, divorce. They quickly took me under their wings and held me late into the nights as I cried in their living rooms. They talked me through the negotiations, poured oil on my wounded heart and most importantly prayed, prayed hard that I would be able to stand again and that God would salvage my remains, and make them beautiful.
He did. An unexpected thing happened. I did stand up again, and the clouds blew over. I began to dream again. Who is Amber and what will I do with this life was the question that burned inside me. I had given my everything to my relationship and nothing to myself. Now was the time to discover me.
Art sprang out of no where though I imagine it was there all along. I had walked past it my whole life until one day I discovered its world inside me. Then it happened fast as creativity that had been locked up for 27 years poured out of me. Surely this hardship had been like "rotting dinosaurs - skeletons" down inside me that turned into "black gold" erupting out of me.
Blackbird was just that, a spontaneous eruption. When I began posting it's raw life forming on social media, the messages began pouring in and it quickly became a favourite of my work. It was almost like a coming out party I wasn't prepared for. So I called it Blackbird after the Beatles song.
Blackbird lyrics:
Blackbird singing in the dead of night,
take these broken wings and learn to fly,
all my life,
you were only waiting for this moment to arise
And that was it, I had taken up my broken wings and was beginning to learn to fly again. Maybe all my life, I was actually waiting for this moment for the real me to arise out of a complete wreckage.
Romans 8:28 (NLT)
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
Blackbird (Sold)
30" x 60" | Oil on canvas
